


One and Only

by BeetleQueen



Category: Labyrinth (1986)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Unresolved Tension
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-18
Updated: 2016-09-30
Packaged: 2018-08-15 18:43:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8068537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BeetleQueen/pseuds/BeetleQueen
Summary: Anonymous asked: You know, we always see Jareth as the pursuer, hardly ever Sarah. I'd love to see a fic where Jareth is the one that's broken hearted over the way Sarah rejected his offer and is totally over her, until she vows to win him back. Lots of ust and angst but with a happy ending. I love long fics, but i don't know if you do requests that are long. I came up with the idea listening to Adele's One and Only thinking it was coming from Sarah's POV. Thank you!





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoy, anon! Sorry about the 4 month wait...
> 
> (see end notes for * marked elaborations.)
> 
> You've been on my mind  
> I grow fonder every day  
> Lose myself in time just thinking of your face  
> God only knows  
> Why it's taken me so long to let my doubts go  
> You're the only one that I want — **(http://genius.com/Adele-one-and-only-lyrics)**

He didn't care.  
  
That was nonsense; he did. He cared deeply. But for the sake of his sanity, it was paramount that Jareth pretended he was fine. Just fine and dandy, in fact.  
  
Certainly not heartbroken. And definitely not pining.  
  
Soon the pretending became second nature. He stopped doubting himself; his mask of confidence slipped back on as though it had never left.  
  
And with that mask, a stream of thoughts. Thoughts designed to alleviate him from any and all of that niggling self-doubt.  
  
It was all _her_ fault. Not his. She'd wished the brat away, and he'd taken him as asked. She'd called his Labyrinth a piece of cake - he'd made it harder, and **still** she moaned.  
  
She'd wanted a fantasy; a romance. And Jareth had, quite easily, given Sarah that as well. He'd told himself then and there that it was part of the game - one more challenge to keep her distracted.  
  
Except Jareth had fallen hard. Seeing this feisty, mouthy little girl in such finery - seeing her become such a radiant woman before his eyes.  
  
Any reservations he'd felt before melted in that moment. She was fit to be his Queen. Fit to rule with him— damn it, he'd even started naming their children while they danced, utterly spellbound.  
  
And then she had to go and ruin it...  
  
Jareth took no blame in that. Even if he was the idiot to put a clock in the peach dream. He'd been cocky enough to think his presence alone would be enough to distract her.  
  
Clearly not...  
  
Well, perhaps the enchanted goblin dancers had been a bit of a bad idea too...  
  
Jareth threw the hand mirror he was glaring into out of the window, ignoring the startled cry of the goblin it must've hit. He wasn't old... These were... What was the wretched phrase Hoggle had used... Laughter lines..?  
  
Jareth had given the dwarf a condescending smirk, remarking that, "You must do a great deal of laughing when I'm not around."  
  
Hoggle hissed back that Jareth's crows feet were looking "especially noticeable today, your Highness", and ran for the hills while the King stood there in awe.  
  
No one had talked back to him before Sarah. They all cowered or obeyed without a second thought.  
  
In the next few years, the castle fell into ruin, most of the goblins now too busy to clean up after themselves (not that they ever did much cleaning before). They had lives to live, and parties to attend. When the first few had disobeyed Jareth and gotten away with it, the rest followed suit.  
  
And it became a slippery slope after that. Books piled up. Important letters went unsent, or unopened. Jareth didn't bother wearing makeup anymore - he never had guests, and he never left the house. He pulled a moth eaten cape around himself, too lazy to enchant the permanently open windows from letting in the draft.  
  
He had been fine before her, and he'd be fine after her.

 

* * *

 

Sarah opened the drawer to her vanity. It had been years since her adventure in the labyrinth, and once she'd gotten home, away went any reminders of childhood. Well... Maybe not all of them. Her shelves were still teeming with bears, and fantasy books. But tucked away from view were some of the things that reminded her of the labyrinth.  
  
Mainly of Jareth...  
  
Sarah picked out the music box, her eyes travelling over the little dancer in her meringue dress. She closed her eyes and within seconds Sarah was back in his arms again.  
  
But he was a liar. Sarah growled, throwing the music box back into the drawer.  
  
He said he'd be there for her - as the world fell down. But that had happened already - was happening right now. For here she sat, lost and lonely, and where was Jareth?  
  
Probably spending time right now with a 'real' woman. Sarah thought back, with a pang of jealousy, recalling the women he'd been surround by in that bubble. Beautiful, curvaceous, made up woman, filling their dresses in ways Sarah had yet to manage. Their red lips whispering in his ear, no doubt of practices she was a still too inexperienced to understand.  
  
Sarah stared at her reflection in the vanity, and held up her lipstick. She painted her lips, trying in earnest to glean some semblance of sophistication. But even at twenty, she was no 'woman'. Still she felt like a girl, ignorant of the finer things in life. Uneducated in the subtle secret ways of adulthood.  
  
Everyone around her fell into place like they knew some kind of trick; some way to make everything easy. Sarah felt wronged. Insulted. Why was it that even the stupidest people seemed to know what they were doing? Why did she have to find everything so hard?  
  
It wasn't fair.  
  
Sarah threw the lipstick at the mirror, satisfied when it bounced off loudly, leaving a red mark. She rubbed the rest off her face with the back of her hand.  
  
"Just a little girl..." She glowered back at herself, green eyes rimmed red with tears. But was she..?  
  
No, she could not have been. Even when she had been but a girl, Sarah had made the King of the Goblins cower in fear. She'd put him in his place, and she had championed his labyrinth, not with a duel, nor even a real fight - but her words.  
  
And Jareth, scrote that he was, didn't even call..!  
  
Sarah suddenly felt cheated again. Surely he had feelings for her; that was what she told herself at night, when she pictured his face. When bare hands slipped beneath the sheets, and Sarah imagined gloves.  
  
He had to care. Otherwise...  
  
Sarah didn't want to think about otherwise.

 

* * *

  
  
Jareth summoned one of his crystals. He did so at least once a month, curious of just how Sarah was doing. More often than not, driving himself mad over how happy she seemed without him.  
  
As it happened, he never caught her sobbing. Every time he spied Sarah, she was spending time with her family, or friends. The crystal balls usually got thrown unceremoniously through his open window whenever he so much as heard Hoggle's voice.  
  
And just what did that little runt have that he didn't?! Sarah had kissed him. Sarah had hugged him..! And Jareth, decked out in all his finery, and best jewels, who had serenaded her with promises of love - who had danced the night away with Sarah - he didn't get so much as a look in, let alone a peck on the cheek!  
  
"Bastard..." Jareth hissed, watching Hoggle and the rest of Sarah's friends as they played scrabble. "Next time I see him, he goes in the Bog..." Jareth continued watching, heart aching at the sight of his Sarah.  
  
Taller now, maybe even as tall as him. Her hair was still long, but fashioned with a centre parting. Jareth hummed to himself that he preferred the side-parting. He watched Sarah's brow furrow, clearly conflicted about something.  
  
"Um..." She began, looking nervous. "Guys, just a quick question..." Her friends all stopped what they were doing, looking up from the game board. "What do I do if... I have feelings for a guy?"  
  
"Depends who it is..?" Hoggle leaned in, the picture of nosiness. Jareth leaned in as well.  
  
"No one you know..." Sarah had barely uttered the words before said crystal ball was launched though Jareth's window, hitting a low flying Spüe*.

 

* * *

  
  
Sarah had lied - she couldn't admit to her friends that she might have, sort of, alright had definitely fallen for the Goblin King.  
  
Now that she really thought about it, he hadn't been much of a threat. In hindsight it was rather similar to the pile of clothes in the back of your closet - in the dark, they fashioned themselves into a looming figure, two buttons becoming eyes if you looked long and hard enough.  
  
But when the bedroom light turned on, all that you saw were a pair of jeans, and a crumpled shirt and socks.  
  
Jareth had seemed so daunting back then. He'd seemed so very powerful, and in control. But through adult eyes, Sarah saw the truth. He was a showman, someone who relied on cheap parlour tricks, posing no real danger whatsoever.  
  
If he had any real power to begin with, why had he not used it? More importantly if she was wrong, and he did have such power - why hadn't he used it..?  
  
Sarah's mind automatically snatched at the first thought that ran through it.  
  
Love was why. He cared, and so he'd toyed with her. Yes, that was why...  
  
Sarah was back in front of her vanity again, overthinking. But if Jareth loved her, he surely would have come back. Sarah had held her breath on the night of her eighteenth birthday, waiting for the clock to strike midnight - for him to whisk her away now that she was of legal age. Yet he didn't come. And over two years later, still he did not appear.  
  
Unless he thought he was being noble. _Love her, but let her go._ Another plausible if idiotic idea.  
  
The only thing Sarah knew for certain was that only Jareth could answer these questions.

 

* * *

  
  
The trip back Underground was simple enough. Sarah had called on the goblins, and a sparse collection of them had indeed turned up.  
  
Sarah was sure there had been many more of the little beasts all those years ago. And Jareth had turned up then, too... She tried to ignore the way her heart sank in his absence.  
  
"Take me to the castle." Sarah addressed one of the goblins, drawing herself up to her full height. **"Now."**  
  
The goblins had (surprisingly) obeyed, and Sarah found herself in Jareth's home. The creatures looked up at her expectantly, as if waiting for further orders.  
  
"Um..." She watched them lean in, eyes agog. "Take the day off..?" Sarah jumped when they all rejoiced, and scampered out of the front door. "Weird..."  
  
The castle was a confusing place. Obviously Sarah would have to navigate the Escher room again in order to get anywhere, for aside from the cluttered throne room, no other rooms seemed to exist.  
  
Sarah took her time investigating. She realised after a while that if you went through a horizontal door, it would lead to a vertical one. Every left turn took you right, and every up staircase took you down. Sarah spied a rather sumptuous looking doorway that stood out from the rest. Jareth's chambers, she surmised.  
  
After a few wrong turns (and a lot of unladylike language) Sarah was standing by that doorway.  
  
She was about to take a step forward when her blood ran cold - for what if he didn't ever want to see her again..? What if barging into his castle, and then his private rooms, was the final straw?  
  
Then again, she'd never find out anything if she left now. And she'd come too far just to leave with her tail between her legs. There was no other option than to enter.  
  
Sarah steeled herself, crossing the doorway. She half expected it to throw her out somewhere else; perhaps at the start of the labyrinth, or as a shortcut straight to the Bog.  
  
Except the room she had entered was a new one to Sarah; not one she'd seen on her travels, and by the looks of things, belonging to the King of this realm.  
  
She ran her fingers over a nearby set of silk drapes, the burgundy material coming apart in her hands like a cobweb. Sarah startled, realising that all the finery and grandeur in the room was threadbare at best - and at worst, on the verge of disintegrating.  
  
She wondered how much time had passed Underground, and how long six years was here. The goblins had come for her. Jareth was nowhere to be seen.  
  
Sarah sank to the floor, overwhelmed with an even worse worry.  
  
What if he was dead..?

 

* * *

  
  
Jareth wasn't dead. He was bathing in the next room over.  
  
"Idiot..." He muttered to no one in particular - and certainly not about himself! No, he wasn't an idiot. He was a gorgeous, fine figure of a man that Sarah would have been lucky to get her hands on.  
  
He wasn't dwelling on this at all - and he certainly wasn't obsessing.  
  
Jareth was fine, and over it, thank you very much.  
  
Totally over it.  
  
"Vixen..." He growled, sinking under the water. Just when he thought he was getting his life back on track, that niggling little worm of self doubt crawled into his ear, whispering not so sweet nothings...  
  
_'You're an old, ugly thing'_ it would say.  
  
_'What can you offer a young, pretty girl like her?'_ Jareth could feel the water boiling around him in his rage.  
  
_'You don't even have power over her - she won't want someone weak... That's all you'll ever be. Pathetic and **weak...** '_  
  
Jareth slowly crawled out of the bath, his posture slumped and dejected. His eyes found the mirror, and he let his gaze sweep over himself.  
  
Before Sarah, he had assumed that his body was godlike - certainly enough to have the women swooning. It had never been unsightly, but now? After years of ignoring plates of food, and being too stubborn to learn to cook for himself, Jareth was getting a trifle thin.  
  
Alright, a trifle was perhaps being generous. Jareth was frail, and very obviously underfed.  
  
His pale skin no longer glowed, but was drab and peaky. His eyes were sunken, and rimmed with dark circles. His usually brilliant hair was now brittle, and lacking of any shine or lustre.  
  
He was a state.  
  
Jareth tore his eyes away from the mirror, having tortured himself enough. He enchanted a pair of tights, and a featherlight blouse around himself. He enchanted them a bit tighter when he realised just how loose they had become.  
  
Jareth sighed, leaving the bathroom. When he entered his chambers, his steps faltered, mismatched eyes wide.  
  
"S-Sarah..?"  
  
Sarah spun around when she heard footsteps, her eyes locking with his.  
  
"Jareth..." She took a shy step forward. Jareth looked... Sarah was suddenly reminded of the curtains, terrified that a single touch might cause the man to vanish in a cloud of dust. "I..." She stepped closer, watching how he shrank back. "I'm... Sorry." She whispered.  
  
"Sorry?" Jareth looked confused. "Whatever for?" He chided himself for appearing so weak in this moment. His bedraggled appearance could've been ignored had he displayed the usual presence and menace he was known for.  
  
But he couldn't quite muster the strength.  
  
"Everything." Sarah reached out with a hand. She watched Jareth's eyes follow the movement, reassuring herself when he didn't object. Her hand was on his arm. "You never came back." She mumbled.  
  
"You never _asked_ me to." Jareth spoke quietly.  
  
"And if I had..?" Sarah watched Jareth pull away, her hand hovering stupidly in midair for a moment before it fell to her side. "Would you have come—?"  
  
"Of course I would have." He snarled, clutching his arms. It was cold; always so cold. "But you did not." Jareth was already scuttling away from her, heading for the Escher room. In moments he'd added more armour to himself, his usual cape wrapped around his shoulders. Had Jareth known it was peppered with moth holes, he certainly wouldn't have bothered. Sarah skipped to catch up, but already he was upside down, and about three staircases away.  
  
"Jareth..!" Sarah scrambled to catch up, forgetting the directions she needed to take in her panic. "Jareth, please..!" She sagged with relief when finally he stopped, stood horizontally one platform away.  
  
"Sarah." He tried to smirk cruelly, but his heart wasn't in it. "My Sarah..." But of course that wasn't true either. She was not his - had never been, and would never be. "Whatever it is you've come here for, please just spit it out. I'm a very busy man." He lied, standing in his usual aloof manner.

"And you can't even **guess** what it is I've come for?" Sarah was glaring up at him, thick eyebrows knitted together.

"I couldn't even begin to fathom..." Jareth grumped, fussing with his cape. He'd noticed the holes, and was now plucking angrily at them. "But perhaps we should ask your... _boyfriend..."_ He hissed the last word scathingly, hating how it made him sound - as though he cared. As though he were jealous! He was perfection; there was nothing to be jealous of.

"What are you talking about?" Sarah looked genuinely confused, which angered Jareth even more. Had she already thrown that poor man aside too? Was there no _end_ to her cruel ways?! "—Jareth?" The fae collected himself, forcing his eyes to lock with hers. Still she looked none the wiser.

 _"Oh, it's no one you **know** , Hedgewart..."_ Jareth imitated her voice shrilly, any hope of not coming across as a petulant child fully thrown out of the window with six dozen or so crystal balls. "So who?" His pasty visage was turning quickly pink. **"Who?!"** He was on his toes, glowering. His expression became even more incandescent when Sarah erupted in a fit of laughter.

"Oh God..." She couldn't help it - Jareth, bony King of the Goblins, shrouded in white silks and satins, looking like an overgrown barn owl, screeching "HOO!" at the top of his lungs - it would make anyone laugh. "Jareth, I was trying not to rock the boat—"

"Boat..?!" He narrowed his eyes. He saw no boat.

"With Hoggle..?" Sarah wiped away a tear, suppressing a guffaw at the owl thing when it resurfaced again in her mind. "I came here for **you** , you stupid man."

"What?" Jareth's shoulders dropped, and he stood there dumbly as Sarah made her way over, skipping quickly across staircases. He startled when one of her hands took his, looking down at it. "For me?" His voice was quiet.

"For **you.** " Sarah pulled him closer, and Jareth realised she was a little taller than him - well, she would not have been had Jareth been wearing his usual platform boots.

"For me..." Jareth repeated, turning rosier still. "Just me..?" He then chanced.

"Just you—"

"And not Hog-brain." The fae interjected snippily.

"And not Hoggle..." Sarah was smirking, her hands grabbing his arms as her face nudged closer. "Just you." Her breath ghosted over his lips, and Jareth felt himself leaning in. "Only. You." The Goblin King succumbed happily, letting Sarah devour his mouth in kiss after hungry kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _***Spüe - One form of flying goblin that nests in great numbers under the eaves of most public buildings in the Labyrinth.** (The Goblin Companion: A Field Guide to Goblins by Terry Jones, Brian Froud)_


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some more fluff; because it was sorely needed...
> 
> Smut to follow in later chapters. Dunno how many more I'll do before that though. This is becoming its own thing..!

It was when Sarah threw her arms around Jareth to deepen the kiss that she noticed just how frail he was. The many layers ensconcing him couldn't hide the sharp angles from her hands, and Sarah pulled back with worry.

But Jareth had other ideas, his hands roaming into decidedly not so PG areas, his breath fluttering in her ear.

"Jareth..." She hummed. "Jareth when was the last time you ate..?"

"Precious, ask me again in forty minutes—"

_"Jareth..."_ Sarah's voice was low in warning. The fae reluctantly pulled back, eyes on the floor.

"I'm sure it was this week—"

**"Jareth."** Sarah's hands were on her hips, the worried mother stance not going unnoticed by the Goblin King. "That's it, I'm making you something. Come on." She grabbed his hand, pulling him along with her through the Escher room. Jareth noticed the trip was a much shorter one than it should have been. Almost as though Sarah had taken a shortcut; but such a thing should have been impossible.

Only _he_ could do that... 

 

* * *

 

Sarah sighed to herself throwing mouldy bits of food over her shoulder. His pantry was absolutely shocking. It was a wonder he hadn't died from food poisoning!

"Sarah, you're throwing out all the best stuff." He nagged playfully, chewing on what looked like a rock in the shape of a bread slice.

"What even is this garbage..?!" She seethed, attacking the cobwebs then with a hand .

"Goblin food." He huffed, his teeth making the most eye watering noises against the cement like substance.

"Oh." Sarah paused, realising how racist she might have just sounded. "Does it... taste—?"

"Awful? Yes." Jareth dropped the rest of his Grit Cake* with a thud before folding his arms. He'd refrained from eating too much of the stuff, lest he get an unsightly hump on his back. The dangers of most goblin food were that they 'enhanced' a goblin's most trademark features. But Jareth was a weirdo by Underground standards, preferring his strange and almost human appearance.

As the King he'd gotten away with it - because Kings can do what they jolly well please, thank you very much. But now that the goblins were gone, his 'freaky' appearance was open to ridicule.

"Hm..." Sarah was looking thoughtful, and Jareth took the chance to wrap his arms around her from behind, his lips on the back of her neck. "Jareth..." She scolded lightly. "You're skin and bones. You need feeding up." Jareth wasn't listening, hips firmly pressed up against her arse, and something notably firm finding its place nestled in the middle.

"Precious, I'm barely hungry... Let me work up an appetite first..?" His voice was needy. Sarah found it hard to fight him, the space between her legs flaring insistently.

"No." She spun around, holding him at arms length. Jareth sighed loudly. "Jareth, I'm not kidding around here." She watched him purse his lips before nodding. "Good, now... How do you usually call the goblins to the castle—?" Sarah jumped when one of them appeared by her feet.

"That will do it." Jareth eyed the little beast warily - if memory served, that one had been the first to insight a campaign against him, throwing goblin custard through his bedroom window. Jareth growled, folding his arms - it didn't even look frightened of him..!

But it looked frightened of Sarah...

"You." She pointed, and the tiny thing squeaked, standing to attention. "You go and get some food— nice food! Food from the Above Ground." Sarah chanced a look at Jareth, he was glowering at the little thing.

"He your prisoner now..?" The goblin squeaked, glaring right back at the fae.

Sarah couldn't believe her ears - just what was going on..? Jareth wrapped an arm around Sarah's waist, smirking.

"No I am not—"

"Touching the Queen punishable offence!!!" The goblin screamed, holding up his lance. It started jabbing at him, and Jareth reared back, trying to bat the little thing away.

"Will you— _Could you please_ — **Oh, for for the love of God, cease at once!** " Jareth bellowed, aiming a kick every now and then.

"Stop it." The goblin did so as soon as Sarah addressed him. "He's not a prisoner. And I want you to get that food." The goblin stared at her in confusion, and so Sarah channeled her inner Queen. _**"Did I stutter?"**_ She roared, causing the tiny creature to scamper off. "God, they're weird..." She shook her head. "And why did he call me that..?"

"The Queen..?" Jareth was thumbing the holes in his blouse that the goblin had torn. There were a few specks of red over the white silk, and Sarah panicked, rushing to his side.

"You're hurt..!" She stammered. Jareth went stock still as she shed him of his shirt, completely fine with the idea of her ripping his clothes off - that was until she drank in his frail torso. Her eyes stopped at his protruding ribs, and then swept up to his knobbly shoulders. "Oh, _Jareth..."_ Jareth wrapped his arms around himself, turning pink again.

"Less of the pitying looks, Sarah." He snatched back his shirt. "And it's barely a scratch—"

"Stop fighting me - or I really _will_ make you my prisoner." She muttered, finding a clean washcloth and running it under the hot tap. Sarah carefully dabbed at his injuries, making sure they were clean. "You can't be on form anyway..." She then smirked, and Jareth gave her a confused look. "Not one suggestive remark - nothing about shackles or bondage. I'm almost offended, Goblin King." She chuckled.

"I don't think I am anymore." He went on when Sarah gave him a look. "King, I mean. They don't take commands from me anymore. But they'll take them from you."

"I don't understand—"

"Sarah, when you bested me..." Jareth threw back on his blouse now that Sarah had finished with him. "It meant that as a ruler, I could not be counted on. But you..." It wasn't that he didn't want to admit to Sarah's power - that for him wasn't an issue at all. But admitting to his own weakness. That was something Jareth hated. "Goblins are like cats. They pick their owners. It seems they want you." He finally met her eyes, his own sad.

"Me." Sarah was leaning against the pantry door. "But I— I can't be. I... Can I..?" She looked positively bewildered.

"You can." Jareth paused. "If you want to." He added sheepishly. Sarah seemed to be turning the idea over in her head. The fae's heart sank; of course he'd gotten ahead of himself. Why on earth would Sarah want to live here - with him of all people, ruling over a bunch of disgusting little creatures? He was about to speak when Sarah cut him off.

"Do the pants come with the job?" She looked down, grinning. Jareth made a very unkingly noise in his confusion.

"Do the— Did you just..." He stammered.

"I'm going to have to move all my stuff in..." Sarah was already walking around the room, her interior decorator side making mental notes. "And we're going to have to get some of the goblins to learn how to clean..." Jareth watched her, eyes agog. He followed her out and into the throne room. "Do I get this chair, or do we sit side by side?" Jareth was about to speak. "Looks big enough to share actually..."

"Sarah." Jareth's tone had her spinning round. "Does this mean you're— Are you staying..?"

"Did you think I'd leave you again?" Sarah's eyes softened, and she sauntered over. She cupped his jagged face, thumbs stroking at the hollows of his cheeks. Jareth relaxed into her touch. "My credit cards are in the red, my apartment has a leak in the ceiling, and my dog died last month. Jareth I've had enough of the Above Ground." The fae pulled her into his arms.

"And your family?" Jareth felt a pang of nostalgia all of a sudden. "Toby?"

"They can visit. Or I can visit them." Sarah hummed, a finger drawing patterns on his jaw. "I'm going to be the Queen - _I_ make the rules now." She winked.

"Yes. You do." Jareth was practically beaming.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _**Grit Cake*: A favourite goblin delicacy. the hard core and rubble that forms the bulk of the cake mix is seperated out in the digestive system and stored in the upper part of the back, producing a hump of great weight which inevitably produces the bent and crouching posture that goblins find irresistably attractive- as demonstrated by the unnamed goblin maiden in the illustration.** _
> 
> _**When toasted on the Halberd grit cake is turned into useful roofing material, which can also be served cold under scrambled frogs' eggs...** (The Goblin Companion: A Field Guide to Goblins by Terry Jones, Brian Froud)_


End file.
